Stocking Aficionado T-Shirts

Bug hanging up stockings

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

The day the stock market went UP.

'There's good news and bad news, J. B. - we now control 51% of this corporation's stock!'

'What do you do with the time you save?'

High security Santa's grotto

"We've called this special Stocholders meeting because we want all of our stock back."

George doesn't really like me using the credit card.

'For Harland, the only game in town is the bulls versus the bears...'

TPP - Investor State Dispute Settlement

'They say a fool and his money are soon parted. Here's a list of fools. Make it happen.'

"You will be visited by three ghosts - the Ghost of Porfolios Past, The Ghost of Present Positions and the Ghost of Commodities Future."

'Just to let you know the cause of your pain and my advice is Quite Watching Stock Prices Go Up And Down.'

Online Shopping.

Cheer up, you'll get your day.

"Most of what I want this year is listed on the Nasdaq."

Sale On Slightly Irregular Designer Shirts

It's a deal. You give me five analysts, three pundits, seven technicians and a soothsayer. I give you six experts, five professors, four consultants and a prognosticator.

Soup Company: Chicken Stock, Beef Stock and Laughing Stock,

'I today's market news, Greed roared back.'

'Stocks were high...then low...then suddenly high again on news of a new drug to treat mood swings...'

'But it didn't cost anything, dear! I did it all off balance-sheet!'

"Who's on duty today...you or me?"

'In today's action, the Dow Jones Industrial Average cratered, then soared, then swooned, then skyrocketed, then plummeted, then rebounded, and finally threw up.'

'I don't know about this new computer inventory system. It just ordered a thousand left handed four fingered surgical gloves.'

"Good God! Has the dollar fallen that far?"

'I actually look forward to hibernating during bull markets.'

'Attention everyone! I'd like to make a rebuttal of the resolution my husband just made about my going SHOPPING.'

'Ms. Clayton, we're counting on you to reverse this trend...'

'Hold my purse. I'm going in only to complain.'

"Sir, there are no waitresses or menus — this is Crate & Barrel."

'It's a growth industry' (tulips from Amsterdam).

"I was doing pretty well in the stock market until I discovered there were laws."

'Wait until you see what you got me!'

Stock market worries.