Natural Comedian Pillows

'Are you trying to make a fool of me?' - 'Of course not. I'd never interfere with nature.'

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

"Extreme miming"

'Go on, Andy, it's high time anteaters learned size isn't everything!'

"It's made entirely out of rejected resumes."

"You're just the man we're looking for. Come around to this side of the desk, and I'll gather up my things and get the heck out of here."

I'm prepared to admit that you may have startled me a bit, sure!

Physician tending a mummy.

'You wouldn't happen to be sitting on my entry to the straightest runner bean competition?'

'Hang on a minute: What does 'IVF' mean?!'

'Darling - I think it's time to stop feeding the birds.'

'That's one hell of a cat-flap Harry. You must have a big cat, heh, heh.'

Grizzly bears are gregarious animals.

"Walking erect is very trendy now."

Try me/try me/try me...

Yet another law of the jungle: 'Absolutely NO howling at the moon after 11 PM!

'Darn those neighbors. A cookie's missing.'

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

"Jeepers, I didn't know anything could gets so hot!"

"Get out of my face!"

"Hope you weren't planning on leaving early."

'Yes, we do have an incentive scheme.We call it 'continued employment'.'

"...and she said 'MOO!'"

'Pray for me.'

"I'm fascinated by body language."

"Did you just do a rooster?"

'It could have been worse...she might have chosen banking.'

Man looks at huge dinosaur fossil in garden, saying: 'It looks great in the rockery, but don't you think you should call the Natural History Museum?'

Slug Bait- snails love it

Penguin