Nanny Hired Mugs

'This buggy gets only about one mile per gal.'

'I stay trim because of high metabolism. Theirs, not mine.'

Madonna of the Pukes.

Cry babies.

Catching Jeffrey To Change His Diaper.

The Baby Walker

A baby duck in a tiny car seat on the mother duck's back.

"Look Mommy, hat!"

'OK, now let's be careful out there.'

'The child is very illogical'

When a toddler hands you their ringing toy phone, you answer it!

"Guys, can you use your Mommy-doesn't-want-to-know-I-exist voices?"

"This is nice, but I can't help but think we forgot something."

"I'm beginning to regret taking this job at the local playgroup."

"We really need more perennials? Aren't my weeds and crabgrass enough?"

"well done rescuing my son. Now, your final task is to quietly transfer the baby to the cradle upstairs, without waking him."

'That reminds me, the seat broke on mine. I must make time to get it repaired.'

I hate deer! What do you have to repel them? They're awful. I've got fences. Sprays. Decoys. Tree's Tree Nursery. I'll takes these. Anything to get rid of the varmints. Ring him up, Twig. I don't know why you are so down on deer. They've been very good to you! Anti-deer.

"I feel I've outgrown this facility, Mrs. Thompson. Could we see what else is around?"

"Does knowing you're being watched on a baby monitor keep you out of mischief?"

"No! I want to live! I want to live!"

Need a Qualified Adult for Pooh Sticks

"I'm bored."

'Don't leave baby alone with this really cool tiny phone. It's a choking hazard.'

'We'll need lots of nappy changes today, the T. V. just said it's going to be wet and windy.'

Fertility goddess. Nanny goddess.

"Darling... I think the Baby's been eating the fridge magnets again."

"Oh, Mrs. Horris, he just said his first words..!"

"We're ecstatic about our new au pair."

'I'm on my way!'

'I think I'll take her to the zoo today.'

'Of course I put my kids first! Look at how much I pay the nanny!!'

Rockabye Baby- $10/hour.

'A generous layer of vaseline makes an excellent tickle repellent!'

'Doorbell. Must be the sitter.'