Naming Ninja Mugs

"Yes sorry. Apple, Orange, Blackberry and all the good fruits are taken."

"In my father's day this may have been a potato peeler but you're gonna be marketing it as a Spud Master X-17B."

'Please tell me you're baby sitting?'

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

Tool Box

"Can we please just stick to the core business?"

'Change is inevitable, espeically when you have a newborn in diapers."

"Is this a 'GOTCHA' question?"

ACME Balloon Company.

"Arithmetic gets a lot harder when you run out of fingers and toes."

'I see you're still trying to get the staff enthused over the weekly meetings.' (Meeting offers free coffee, free snacks, eye-popping charts, exciting videos and free idea pads).

Best Seller

'Yeah, I don't have trouble remembering my times tables, but I stink at algebra...'

"I hate negative numbers, and I'll stop at nothing to avoid them."

Martial Arts

I've found a loophole in your loophole

"Which tax bracket are you looking to avoid?"

"I spent the whole day cleaning the house. My cleaning lady comes tomorrow and I didn't want her seeing things like that!"

"That's more like it Perkins..!!"

'I'm not comfortable with his method of fixing our balance sheet.'

'Eleven?.. you mean there's more numbers beyond the number of fingers we have?'

'Henry, I'm here to trim back your budget.'

Propping up a profits chart.

"The red bars represent the obscene numbers this quarter. The black bars are censoring those red bars."

Book Thief in True Crime Department

"You told Pastor Bob about my room, didn't you?"

'We're in good shape. Nobody understands our financial statement.'

Customer Complaints - "Thank you, Thompson, for collecting the statistics."

'For people to think we just pluck figures out of THIN AIR is RIDICULOUS, we use a bucket.'

IRS tax instructions.

"Easy day at school. Spelling was easy as ABC, math was easy as one two three, and music was easy as Do Re Mi."

"Actually, this is where there was a slight earth tremor."

'Wish you would've warned me about this. I hate getting ambushed.'

Geek in indignation at fellow geek's T-shirt which says: 'I'm with someone who can only recite pi to 100 decimal places.'

Statistics Research: You Can Fool 45% of the People 55% of the time, but you can't fool all the people all the time.