Mystical Mystic Pillows

"Finally, Miss Big-Shot calls her dead mother!"

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

'Any minute now I'll be getting a headache.'

'I sense that someone is about to swindle you.' 'Wow, thanks for the warning! How much do I owe you?'

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

Tiny Visions

"It's a long way to Enlightenment. You might need some cash."

Czarcasm

The Witches Discover The Wok

"I'm not sure you'll want to know this."

'Oh, no - I have to read each tentacle - that'll be extra, of course.'

'The secret to great wealth and spiritual contentment? Ok, hold on...I think I've got an app for that..'

Wikipedia...

Madame Lucille - Fortune Teller 'I predict the future'.

"Do you have an appointment?"

A cow goes to the Fortune Teller - 'I can see two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun...!'

"I see a pretty lady who looks a lot like you....a very kind lady...and she's adopting what appears to be a box of adorable kittens!"

God's Phone

'I want to find out what the formula was I wrote yesterday on the blackboard and was erased by the custodian.'

Roy, if you can hear me, the Mets are twenty games over .500 and they have a good shot at clinching the N. L. East."

'You're going on a long journey. Have you got an OAP's bus pass?'

"He says he's been sending you messages from beyond the grave but it's possible they're going straight into your junk folder."

Witches of Instagram

'Your future looks charming.'

"Forget the palm dearie...I'll read yer race."

"Did you have a cat?"

'I'm sorry, Madam Zola. I'm afraid you no longer have second sight.'

"So how much money have you made from your psychic hotline business?"

"All the celebrities come here."

"Even if I did believe that he was communicating through you. I'm afraid it's too late to change the will now."

YOU HAVE A VERY LARGE GENIUS GRANT LINE.

'But if you want the real lowdown, we'll need some of your DNA.'

"I see you, I see a vet, you're sore for weeks afterwards."

"Oh, the crystal ball rolled off and fell right on my foot! Didn't see it coming!"