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'Then it's settled. She gets the house, he gets the cars and the video games go to the winner of a game of 'Guitar Hero'.'

'Choked on his own vomit. I wonder how many points you get for that.'

Shepherd and eurydice

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

They hated me.

Louis Armstrong

A Symphony of Penguins

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

'Houston, I'm prepared to land...'

Pete Townshend Vineyards

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

"Here's another one written in E minor and in case you haven't guessed by now, it's the only chord I know."

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

"Don't get strung out by the way I look, don't judge a book by its cover."

When Ted and Nancy would dance, it was as if they were the only couple on the floor....

Can You Spot the Differences?

"Evidence suggests she was working on the puzzle, got up to make tea, husband enters and puts last piece in..."

'It's good - but it's not digital quality.'

I could have danced all night!

Mozart's First Movement - Baby Mozart is sitting on the potty.

Mardi Gras

12 O'clock was 'I'm a tractor time.'

CSI: Mother Goose Unit...'Hmmm...I'm beginning to suspect that perhaps mister Dumpty's demise wasn't simply a tragic accident.'

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

Robert Fripp

A small snooker player chalking his cue.

Baby Piano

Marimba

'I love your playing....especially when you stop!'

"God, I hope no one asks me to sing."

Lennon and McCartney.

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

Cimafunk

'Nothing beats seeing your favourite band play live.'

Unforgettable, that's what you are... Gnat King Cole