Mud Pie Maker Gifts

"Gracie! School just ended and you're already a complete mess!"

'It needs more dirt.'

"My papie says I'm going to be the first in my family to go to college!"

Playing pig

"Your Honor, prior to sentencing, if it please the court, I'd like to make just a few brief remarks about pâte brisée."

The finer points of marriage.

'I'd love to play house, Kevin, but I've got a business to run.'

"I'll wear any kind of dirt, but I prefer a rich loam with lots of humus."

Wedding Wellies

'Times sure have changed. When I was your age, I made them from scratch.'

'Tastes just like my mother's pies because she too made hers from a mix.'

"Gracie, you're a good mud artist."

'One thing about beer -- you never get buyer's remorse.'

'Make it quick, Mom! I've got to get back and finish my mud pies.'

"It's an apple pie, try it..."

'When you said the tractor was down, I thought...'

'Shakin' bacon.'

"We have a job for you. . .in the crust station."

"I'm not a kid anymore, mom. I can hit myself in the face with a pie by myself."

'I had no choice. He pulled a fork on me.'

'These are exquisite! You simply must give me your recipe.'

"I like him. He's not afraid to get his hands dirty."

During the winter I shovel snow. In the spring I mop the mud. In the summer I sweep up dust and during fall I rake leaves. In the theater of the seasons, I'm always a member of the cleanup crew!

Clown throwing pies at birds in the park.

"Gracie! How could you? Do you know what little girls are made of?"

Mathematician Food Fights.

"No! Don't jump in that muddy puddle! You haven't got your best clothes on!"

'It's an acquired taste.'

Clown interviews.

"How do you know it's dirt? Maybe it's soil."

Baldo eats mud cookies Gracie has made for Christmas.

'I may not look like much but f**k with me and you're dead!'

'An oil spill in the YARD?'

'Here, I made you a mudpie with a file in it.'

"Hack into Acme Pie Company and get their recipe for blueberry scones."