Moving In With Roommates T-Shirts

"I've learned to live with the ever-present specter of death, but mostly because it's started chipping in for rent."

Domestic Superheroes!!

LAY ZEE FUK

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

"In my house, 'dirty dancing' means it's time to mop the floor."

DO Not Disturb (Except For Meals)

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to work at home."

Biofelineism

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

"I finally found a use for that old home repair book..."

"You've changed."

"Who's taking my order—the committee of the whole, or is there a liaison for decaf?"

A man sees a leak in his ceiling and drills a hole in the floor under leak to by pass his apartment.

"It's the sequel to 'Cooking for One'."

"I guess opposites do attract. She's a real shaker, and he's such a grind."

'Is there any chance at all I could get you to stop leaving your pantyhouse laying around?!'

Girl who can't cook meets guys who can't fix stuff.

Layer cake

"Someone’s in the kitchen. Did you lock up my kibble?"

Love is when you watch television together.

"Lazy? I've been social-networking my ass off."

"Again, are you sure I didn't mention about bringing your own 3-D glasses?"

Things my vacuum likes to suck up

'Scratch 3 and 5. 3's had a fight and 5's just going to live together instead.'

"Has the Wi-Fi seemed slow to you lately?"

'Are we broke yet?'

"You're hogging the covers again!"

"I use broccoli rabe as a litmus test."

What are you in the mood to get confused watching tonight?