Mouse Mystic T-Shirts

No way am I sticking my paw in there!

Mouse in a hamster wheel.

"I'm not sure you'll want to know this."

Spiritualism: Meet the Authors.

'Oh, no - I have to read each tentacle - that'll be extra, of course.'

"Finally, Miss Big-Shot calls her dead mother!"

"You are going to have lots of puppies."

YOU HAVE A VERY LARGE GENIUS GRANT LINE.

"Your mother says 'wear a bra'."

'I really don't know how you got here with your life line!'

Ill next Thursday

Amateur Palmist

'Naughty boy, I see you clawing my curtains.'

"The fact that you're here means you will continue to make poor life decisions."

Hog Futures

'...and where did you bury the bone?'

"Okay brother Bickle, you can keep your underpants on"

"Shhh - he's trying open his third nostril."

"Honey! A Jewish starfish!"

'Ha Ha! Stop seeing astrally and look behind you, Bob!'

'I don't know - asceticism just doesn't seem like ENOUGH any more,'

'I see you're not wearing clean underpants.'

'I may charge a lot but you get much more through me. I'm a psychic large.'

"Your life will soon resemble a soggy old clump of leaves."

'Well, I'll be darned! It looks like just a lot of the same old stuff from here on out for you.'

'When will it be o.k. to feel irrationally exuberant again?'

"Can't you ever relax?"

"In case of emergency, break glass."

Dyslexic Palm Reading

"Forget it - I've tried it before, and cats can't be enlightened."

"I see a wild celebration...I see music, dancing, much food and revelry! . . . I see - oops!! Sorry....wrong party."

'I called them, and told them what you were going to do tomorrow! '

A fortune-teller working her new big plasma crystal ball.