Mouse Ear Collector Pillows

Silence of the Chickens...

'All I want for Valentine's Day is a Greek fisherman's cap.'

'Can I have mine with the peak at the front '

Official Team Cap With Beard

"The children took off their own coats this morning, Pastor."

'Does my head look big in this?'

Cat hunting in a cuckoo clock.

'Try his land line.'

'Dude, ya hat's on backwards.'

"I want one of those!"

"How can you say my hat is on back to front when you don't know which way I'm going to go?"

'Fantastic!Stupendous!Masterly!Mind blowing!Polished!Unbeatable!Amazing!Incredible! Out of this world!...a performance that's left me speechless.'

'I hope you don't mind, dear — I got my ears pierced.'

'Be careful what you say around Marjorie...'

"It took years of vocal training, but I now have a vocal range from squeaky right down to tenor..."

Migrating Cuckoo Clock

Ed's Salary Cap

Octopus Baseball Fan

'I wish you'd buy another hat!'

Little Known Historical Fact: After regaining consciousness at the last minute, Davey Crockett's coonskin cap went on to become the Alamo's only survivor.

Bell invents the telephone.

"I've traveled billions of light-years and visited countless planets. Earth is the only place I can't get a signal."

'Hmmm, the 27th you say... Yes, I'm away that day, so I guess it's OK for you to play...'

Tour guide: 'And there it IS folks! The start of Switzerland's spectacular snow-capped mountains!'

"In the olden days, people used payphones. Beats me how they took selfies!"

Strictly off the record.

Hits Needed, please click.

"Another case of wearing too many presidential candidate buttons."

"I just pick a new one each season. How else would you get a new Apple?"

"I'm sorry, but I'm afraid your son just isn't very smart."

Handicap

'I'm sorry, but I'm not allowed to sell you that smart phone without first verifying your IQ.'