Mounted Patrol Officer Mugs

'The chief put me back into a black and white.'

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

Police Feline Unit

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

"Evidence suggests she was working on the puzzle, got up to make tea, husband enters and puts last piece in..."

Nelson Mandela in despair over the crime rates in SA.

CSI: Mother Goose Unit...'Hmmm...I'm beginning to suspect that perhaps mister Dumpty's demise wasn't simply a tragic accident.'

Steep Hill, Slippery When Wet, Watch for Cars Going Faster Than You.

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

Neo-International Law

'Still not ready to talk? Ok dip him again.'

Missing Persons...'I'm not sure when she disappeared - sometime during the football season.'

'Hello? Missing Persons?'

Round up all the king's horses and all the king's men for questioning.

"Don't you think it's time we talked about Operation Doug?"

"Talk, Wallace - where'd you hide the loot?"

hard-boiled egg...

"Postwar is hell."

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

"Your hunch was right, Officer Garcia. We'll need a good editor to clean up this manuscript and bring his unfinished novel to a satisfying conclusion."

"This is probably not the time to admit I only joined the force because I figured we'd just be chasing cat burglars."

Military Medals

HDQTRS division, Motor Pool and Covert Ops.

'This one's for marrying him, and this one's for raising the kids.'

"First Lady Lettuce goes missing, then Colonel Crouton followed by Reginald Radish... Great Caesar's Ghost! Someone is making a salad!"

Timmy had one heck of a security blanket.

'The meek shall inherit the Earth!'

'As it's your first day we're going to start you on something easy.'

Kid to mom: 'Tell me again about the time you helped fortress a city, subdue hostile fire and got home and baked us all raspberry strudels.'

"Don't wait up. I'll be working late again tonight."

'What's wrong with those Europeans? We have more murders in this city than England, France Germany and Spain combined.'

Trump secret police

A Hard Look At Hard Looks

"Why didn't one of the bears just call 9-1-1 and have that girl arrested for trespassing?"

"It's not the first time he'd been warned about wearing a long tie when leaning over the shredder."