Mountain Top Tracker Pillows

"Guys, my bad... we gotta start over... forgot to turn my fitness tracker on."

Man on Snowdon with GPS system - "I'd be lost without it."

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

'Truth is fine, but I really need marketable ideas.'

"Hey, welcome to the Catskills. Anyone here from New Jersey?"

"Don't you want to hear about the day I had?"

'Hello there, how y'doin'?'

'The trouble is, once you've attained enlightenment, it's all downhill.'

"Dunno...they all look the same to me..."

'It's normal -- Enlightenment freaks a lot of people out.'

Run from the hills!

'It's normal -- Enlightenment freaks a lot of people out.'

"Honesty, I saw a train yesterday"

'It's not considered good form to brag about extinguishing your ego.'

"Write your acceptance speech before winning the award."

"Well, who you gonna believe? Me or Wikipedia?"

'Did you try 'Google'?'

'Excuse me, are you abominable?'

"I totally forgot what I came up here for."

"Sometime, maybe we could run down to Lhasa for some SPICED gruel, huh?"

Minnesota Weather.

'I know we're not supposed to wear them, but I got it for Father's Day.'

"This year we'll focus on the road, next year we can focus on building the highrise on the mountain."

'Trust me, the deer have been here. I see tracks everywhere... and look! Fresh droppings!'

"Well done, yes, it's a skunk scent. Concentrate though, can you smell the faint trace of perfume? It's a female skunk..."

Wise Man Souvenir Stand.

'Dinosaur footprints!'

'The Meaning of Life or your life!'

In these hard economic times, positive self worth trumps negative self worth.

"I would take out the curse words, but otherwise I think it's fine."

"Everest summit 1 km merge left"

'Hello?...still there?...yeah, sorry, I just had to move to get a better signal.'

'You've wasted a lot of time. It's all on my blog.'

"You do the Hokey Pokey and you turn yourself around. That's what it's all about."