Mountain Top Meditator Mugs

'I don't know anything about Nirvana - I came up here to DIET.'

'I'm going to practice on you before I start managing other people.'

'Which would be more Zen ? a pizza with nothing, or a pizza with everything?'

How's my enlightenment? Call 1-800-Nirvana.

'Do you ever just feel like getting away from it all?'

It must be December again -- I just had a vision of sugarplums.

"I decided to get comfortable...we have a lot to talk about."

'Actually I only do this on weekends.'

'No, even I don't know the secret of golf.'

'Hey, hey -- You've got to stay focussed.'

"In the Game of Life, my son, the fix is in."

"I'm hoping to sell my startup - a chain of fast-food meditation centers - to Google for seven figures."

"The meaning of life is cats."

'So then I thought, what's the idea job for a gentleman with my years of experience, wisdom and a desire to help others.'

Wisdom for dummies

'I hired a decorator.'

"I'm just checkin' my email, OK! I AM NOT googling it..."

'I've been up here almost a month now -- when do we get paid?'

'Because Elvis is FULL of philosophical insights.'

'Hello?...still there?...yeah, sorry, I just had to move to get a better signal.'

"Oh great!...He;s a fitness guru!!"

"My koan is to comprehend the sound of one hand clapping."

"I accept the cookies I cannot change."

WHILE YOU WERE OUT OF BODY...

'Enlightenment isn't EITHER overrated!'

'Nothing against you, but I'm thinking about going back for my master's.'

'Well, you'll just have to CONTROL your urge to yodel!'

'I consider the Buddha to be a living document.'

Delivery.

"Thirty-seven years up here and my ears STILL pop!"

'This is goodbye, Goopta -- Barack Obama offered me a job writing platitudes!'

'The secret to happiness is to stay away from low-lying coastal areas which are most susceptible to storms from global warming.'

"I'm going on a retreat."

'That's old Goopta - he decided to quit at the top of his game.'

'We only get an hour for lunch, so your best bet is to brown-bag it.'