Mountain Retreats T-Shirts

Judgment Day is coming next Monday. Repent. Now, hold on. How can I believe you when so many dire prophecies haven't come true? I sealed myself in a shelter twice in the late '60s, hid in the Appalachian Mountains a decade later. A huge bunching of Judgment Day visions in the late '80s led me to simply get a time share in the Colorado mountains … Getting out of town doesn't spare you Judgment Day. I don't think. Lemme double-check the clues in Marmaduke. Mostly I needed an excuse to get away. Th

'Well, we'll have to move into town, then - We can't afford a wheelchair ramp.'

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

'Are we there yet? Huh? Have we achieved Nirvana yet? Huh, have we?'

Monk on the beach

"1972: Kim and Doug invited us to their key party... Sounds groovy! 2017: We just got an evite from Kim and Doug to join them on an ayahuasca retreat in Peru... Tommy starts hockey and my father is about to die—no way."

'Therapy always works best in a safe environment ... such as your old tree house.'

"It's either enlightenment or excruciating boredom."

"That's it sorted then - this year we'll spend a fortnight in the spare bedroom."

'You know, if we had a bed and breakfast, we could use it ourselves!'

"At last - no Trump."

Priest

Self Storage Unit

The Old Woman in the shoe questions her decision to spend her empty-nest years in a condo at a ski resort.'

"No thanks, I need time away from madness."

'Today's Presentation: God's Miracles.'

'Lost in the Jungle I found this Buddhist retreat...'

I'D RATHER BE IN MIAMI, 'Oognik, I'd like to talk to you about your attitude...'

"I don't think there's enough vodka for another week in Canada."

'Becoming enlightened fifteen minutes before I did doesn't EITHER give you seniority!'

"Tuesday is my day off - leave a message..."

"Fred, no one is going to bother you here. Put away the Bare Spray."

Missionary Statement: Spread the Word.

Go away

Musings of a Marooned Mountain Man

"I moved out here for peace and quiet, but now I keep talking to myself."

''Fasting' doesn't mean eating fast food!'

'We'd like to visit a peaceful police state away from any terror treats.'

A rest by the way

No caption. (Painter looks at mountain scenery but paints a cityscape.)

'I'm getting worried about Goopta -- he's been having an out-of-body experience for three weeks now.'

"We can't blame the travel agent, you asked for somewhere quiet and away fro it all."

'I'm self isolating, you idiot!'

"I was social distancing. Until you just showed up."

"I always come here when I need to blow of some steam."