Mortgage Payment Pillows

"If you have not paid we will be forced to sell your home, furniture and all assets and evict you and your family from the property. If however you have paid, please ignore this letter."

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

The Tightrope Balancing Act of Home Ownership and Interest Rates.

'You shouldn't have taken that personal pension.' 'You shouldn't have taken that endowment mortgage.' 'When do you get your free tv license?' Job's comforters, today.

"You never actually own a pension pot - you merely look after it for the next government."

"This is Mr. Harrington, our mortgage nerd."

'The hard hats? In case of falling interest rates.'

'The hard hats? In case of falling interest rates.'

"Your repayments start now!"

"Good morning - I'm from your bank. We'd like our house back please!"

'I do the work of three men...how about giving one of us a decent salary?'

I have a dream.

"Whatever you do, keep up with your mortgage payments."

"I'm going to look for a mortgage...I may be some time!"

"At last they paid off their sub-prime fairy-tale and lived happily ever after."

"if you miss a payment, I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your house down."

It doesn't matter if our house is made out of bricks, we've got a sub-prime mortgage!

"Apparently he told Chris Tarrant it was just enough to pay off his mortgage!"

'You don't know how lucky you are. My mortgage is worth more than my house.'

What do you mean, you've done more for me than my mother did? We've carried you for 10 months!

"Does this mean my loan has not been approved?"

"I'd love to help but at the moment I'm saddled with this enormous mortgage."

'Is there anything we can do to repay you other than to repay you?'

'We have a cash flow problem too. Our problem is that your mortgage payments aren't flowing our way.'

'I'm sorry, but without a significant deposit, we can't give you a mortgage.'

"Now I know many of you still have questions about reverse mortgages...."

"By offering your home as security, you are giving the lender a legal claim to your property."

Man's Mortgage is Covered By Endowment Policy.

Now that our kids are grown and the house is paid off...

' I earn a six-figure income, if you count those two little numbers after the decimal point.'

"Good morning Mr. Perkiss - I'm from your local bank. I've come to take our house back..."

"We can mortgage your future for a very attractive low interest rate."

'But on the bright side, I never worry about the housing booms and bubbles.'

'We made the last payment and we were burning the mortgage to celebrate.'

Banker: The Mortgage the Merrier.