Morning Paper Enthusiast Prints

'Good night was it last night,n dear?'

Newspaper

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up in this office and you'll pay the price.'

"Why don't you ever fetch anything good like a pizza?"

Evolution of a coffee drinker.

"Just as I thought! You used our competitor's paper for your resume!"

1,572 Performances.

'OK, who moved the photocopier?'

'Do you want toast with that?'

'Household water use'

"Well, it's another brand-new day. What do you say to getting up and looking the damn thing straight in the eye?"

Sunday.

"I'm more of a day owl."

"Hurry, I've been waiting for you."

"I still jump out of bed every morning. I just don't stick the landing as often."

'You're beat. Maybe you need to wake up to a better morning news team.'

'you just don't get the idea of being a watchdog, do you?'

'Your polar ice cap is melting.'

'Grandpa isn't very child-friendly, is he?'

"According to the Times, the cartoonist drew my right hand wrong."

"Honey, could you pass me the cow."

'On the contrary-I quite enjoy that Monday morning feeling!'

'Normally I don't like a newspaper because of its pictures.'

"Reading the Sunday Funnies 'religiously' does not count as worship."

'My advice; forget the elephant in the room - focus on the Quad Demy.'

"Rapunzel? Rapunzel moved out years ago. I'm Bruce, and I have a stack of old newspaper clippings I'd like to show you."

"Good coffee."

"Dang it."

"Can't you forget about the FT for once?"

'How long has what been going on?'

'Look. I fetch it - I get to read it first.'

Squeeze on Public Spending.

'He's a man of few words. Words to the editor not included.'

'So we print it every four years. What do you call that?'