Morning Joker T-Shirts

I don't really wake up until he yells coffee-doodle-doo.

Banana Split...

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

"AHHHH, MORNING!"

I hate monday mornings.

"I run around this high school track every morning."

'Hey, wait for me!'

Jogging Bottoms

"If I adopt you, you're going to have to wake me up and walk me twice a day."

'Anybody for breakfast?'

Business man sees himself as a shark

"I'm thinking about letting myself get old."

'Geez, I hate these fun runs!'

'When Einstein wrote about time and relativity he must have been watching a football game where the last 30 seconds took two hours.'

'The doctor is running a little late this morning; but a couple more laps around the park and he should be back at his desk.'

'... and finally, before tip-off, let's all be courteous and turn off our cell phones.'

'Don't you love the clean, fresh smell of the morning air?'

'Goodbye, dear. This is the kind of day that makes you feel glad to be alive.'

'I've met you before...I'm not good with names, but I never forget a pace!'

'How do you feel when you get up in the morning?' 'Amazed!'

"You idiots … we lost!"

Runner's High, Runner's Low

Receiving the early-morning T-mail.

'There are two types of cholesterol - the good type, then the one you've got.'

"I've been telling everyone how athletic you are."

False encouragement.

"Awake and doing great"

"Go back to sleep? Sleep at the office?"

'He isn't use to getting up this early.'

AL'S GYM, 'We're going to make a new man of you!' 'Will he have new credit cards?'

"Uh ho. It looks like the Ref's giving him the yellow vuvuzela."

"Don't rush me! I won't be much of a busy bee if I don't get my second cup of coffee."

I'm in a Beatles-inspired band with a few buddies. One guy is a software engineer who wrote a song about a lengthy, convoluted program. It's called the "The Long and Winding Code." The magazine editor wrote a song about checking articles for accuracy. It's titled "Facts Man." And there's a song by the factory foreman about sullen workers tightening nuts all day. It's call "Twist and Pout." You should do a song warning about the wordplay. We have one! The title is "Here Comes the Pun"!

Sometimes the 'Staggers-in-at-4 AM Bird' beats the Early Bird to the worm.

Tred carefully mill.