Monarch Buff Mugs

'You've made a powerful enemy'

'Which Louis am I again?'

"That King's got NO sense of humour..."

'Sire, your new fortress was fine for your nephew's fifth, but I fear it is set for a sterner test.'

1599: Shakespeare's Agent knew what the public wanted

Swiss army hospital...'scalpel...'

Knight Golfing

'The Burrito King.'

"It is we."

"Oh boy charades! I love charades! Something big? Is it a bird? It's sharp! Behind? Above?"

"Our focus group will butcher your focus group."

Missing You.

"'Conquer Spain'? 'Balance the budget'? 'Reform the justice system'? -- You call this a honey-do list?"

'Your Grandpa achieved greatness, he thrust greatness upon me, and then you were born great!'

"Is this the same gold bar I gave you last year?"

Next in Lion

'No, you can't play poker tonight! The last time you played, you lost Schewig-Holstein!'

"To begin with, I would like to express my sincere thanks and deep appreciation for the opportunity to meet with you. While there are still profound differences between us, I think the very fact of my presence here today is a major breakthrough."

"Yes, but you were the defender of the wrong faith."

"Don't worry, princess, I'm sure one day your Mr. Divine Right will come along."

Best mates

"Say! While I'm off in the Holy Land, why don't you find a little crusade of some kind that interests you?"

"Frank, I want you to try antidepressants."

"Of all the labour saving devices invented in the last 70 years, this is one's favourite."

"I have to admit. You talked a good game."

''Depression'? -- You or the country or both?'

"Very few people are aware that the 'New York Times' Sunday crossword puzzle is contagious."

Knights of the Square Table.

Hysterically laughing monster.

'This is great! -- I should have thought of tax simplification years ago!'

"Never gonna give thou up -- Never gonna let thou down -- Never gonna run around and desert thouuuuuu."

"It's either this or a country run by lawyers."

'Between you and me Wizard, is it true that you intellectuals have pointed heads?'

'He just outlawed his in-laws.'

(Mother Goose: playboy's Mirthful Master of the Macabre serves Up Some Strange Twists On a Clutch of Children's Classics.) "Is this supposed to be somebody's idea of a joke?"