Molar Master Pillows

'I told you not to get too close while checking his back molars!'

'It's a chart of office morale. This is where you went on vacation.'

"In my house, 'dirty dancing' means it's time to mop the floor."

'Ok..Ok...I'm putting the lawnmower back in the shed!'

"Try this new IPA I just finished. Let me know if the malts and hops are layered like last week's batch." "Bailey was a really 'good boy'."

'Told you to get your mower fixed.'

TV Chef Cooking Range

"Dad's dinner really is melt-in-your-mouth...it's half frozen!"

The Maryland School of Art's Class of 1998 Celebrating This Week's Commencement With The Traditional Thesis Painting Toss.

"I don't think he can touch your in-the-dirt ball."

Cubits? Haven't You gone metric yet?

'How damp is this place? Let me put it this way: I use mold and mildew remover as a skin care product.'

Cook for 3 minutes stir, wait 30 years to discover if the contaminated ingredient gives you stomach cancer.

'Please don't read anything into the minutes, Ms. Thomas. Just reading the minutes will suffice.'

Microwave - 'Table 19 sends compliments to the chef!'

'I think the microwave has finally given up the ghost.'

"If anyone has a question do not hesitate to open your mouth wide up."

'Listen,kid, you're going to have to lower your standards if you ever want to throw the sleazeball.'

"We're all metric now..."

A janitor stomps on, mops up and bottles some grapes to make "Truly Affordable Beaujolais".

Headstone in bird cage, "We really loved our budgie.."

Lousy Ventriloquist Fears Return to Normal

"Parting the church lawn and the Red Sea are not exactly the same ."

"In other words, it breaks large molecules into small ones."

'I'm making pot pie.'

Checking watch

Cleaner and sculpture

The Lecture.

'This has GOT to be good... it's MICROWAVABLE.'

The new microwave has been a great time-saver for Monica, she can burn dinner and still have plenty of time to make restaurant reservations

'Son, now that you're 16, I thought I'd let you drive.'

"He had his food with all the garlic and the onions and then burped into his mask... did he die of corona, or did he die with corona?"