Modern Society Critique T-Shirts

"The star next to the Big Dipper is a satellite monitoring this conversation."

"You be the moral grandstander and I'll be the politically incorrect troll."

"Nature speaks to me of God’s presence, yet God is a total stranger to the restless world of men." "Why the #!@* is there no signal?!"

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."

"If there were really a God, trees would come with outlets and wifi hubs."

"So, like, don't make any big plans for this weekend."

The Evolution Of Man.

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

"Don't forget to rate us on stable-BnB."

"Tarzan no want computer."

Down With Wikipedia

Early Man Late Man

Daily Routine

'You cant do anything these days without someone suspecting your motives. . . there is only one way out. . . inaction.'

'I can remember when paranoia was unusual.'

"I've got something in what used to be a decrepit, run-down, unfashionable area."

"In the old days people with small dicks needed big cars. Today they write hate comments against Greta Thunberg."

'This unexpectedly concludes tonight's program -- the sponsor bailed out.'

Man calling Phone Privacy Centre

Yeah, I'm standing here alone yelling a bunch of nonsense. If I had a cell phone, you wouldn't bother me!

Medical Bracelet

A beach has meters.

"Have you noticed how blatant sex is everywhere in the culture but here?"

"I medicate first and ask questions later."

"Kids today are so blasé. Her first word was 'meh' instead of mommy."

"Power! Power!"

'Well, I'm not telling him off. He might be armed.'

Yeah, I'm standing here alone yelling a bunch of nonsense, but if I had a cell phone, you'd think it was acceptable!

"I forgot to call in dead."

Kingdom of Heaven- Exact Change Only

"I still think it's inappropriate to put emoticons in your coroner's report."

"Scherer Chevrolet never forgets my birthday."

"It's not a fitness fad. They don't want to lose connectivity."

"The scariest part is knowing that someday something'll come along that will make us go, 'Even the spider mutants weren't this bad.' "