Modern Parenting Advocates Pillows

Kid reads from menu: 'Most kids just get a drink of water, you know.'

Modern Baby Mobiles

"I got a gold star for going the longest without looking at my phone in class."

"Actually, it is a bad time — I’m rushing to get the kids out of the oven."

'He's not talking yet, but his texting skills are excellent...'

"Hang on. Mommy's just checking to see if she's still relevant to the outside world."

"So, when he says, 'What a good boy am I,' Jack is really reinforcing his self-esteem."

Amazon Drones Delivering Babies

"Oh, Frank, look! He's sending his first tweet!"

"He just said his first word!"

A child sitting on a swing - while playing with a hand-held electronic device or phone

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Kid is 'Born to Text'.

"Never mind Benjamin – he just lawyers-up to get attention."

'Those are my triplets. Com, Net and Org Barnes.'

"Is the Itsy Bitsy Spider obsessive-compulsive?"

"With the baby-cam, there is no privacy."

"We sing her to sleep with songs about recycling."

"I brought frankincense." "I brought gold." "I brought diapers!" "A wise woman!"

You're right-this is way better than a standing desk.

"Now, Mrs. Stevens, go to work, relax, and leave the social engineering to us."

'Have you googled me to see how old I was when I was born?'

'I don't care if an app on your phone is monitoring you, you still need a baby sitter when your father and I are gone.'

"They're a very hi-tech family. Apparently, even their baby was cordless."

Phone Mittens

"Santa said to stop making toys. From here on out we'll be making computers and phones. Does anyone know anything about technology?"

'Sending someone to his room was a punishment when I was a kid.'

"Are we there yet? Are we there yet?..."

"We're going to start with the birds and the bees and then work our way up to the new reproductive technologies."

'I'm so glad this bedtime story comes in audio.'

'Jimmy made his first blog post today.'

"They grow up so fast. From Mother Goose to Google."

'We'd like to christen him 2GR4T7VXS35. That way it'll be easier for him to get his own web domain name when he's older.'

"Did you want to know if the baby's a boy or a girl?"

Big book of memes