Modern Gardener Gifts

Genetically Modified Apples

Man watering electronic flower.

Prize vegetables.

What are you giving Mother Earth this year?

'If I had known it was going to be such a late Spring, i would have never started my garden seeds, indoors.'

'Harold, when was the last time you cleaned the pool?!'

So Close..

'Make sure you pretend to water it.'

'You say 'dead.' I say 'low maintenance.''

"Well, that's created a little order in a world of chaos."

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

Gardener clipping topiary stairs

The Endless Battle of the Organic Gardener

Gardener attacked by plants.

"Cheery little flowers, saying good night, saying good morning!"

"We really need more perennials? Aren't my weeds and crabgrass enough?"

Pumpkin patch

"The woman on the fire escape who acted like it was a balcony"

Plant Lady

Gardener

Doing the borders.

"First time pruning?"

'We use to tiptoe through the tulips. . . now we just waddle through the weeds.'

Plants Cheer as They Get Watered.

An Unexpected Guest.

'I used to do that, but it just grows again.'

"Usually gardeners only have green thumbs, so you must really spend a lot of time in the garden."

'You wouldn't happen to be sitting on my entry to the straightest runner bean competition?'

Yardless: Please help

I guess she had other plans for you.

"Maureen Alsop is leaving her magnolia, and her delphinium and her cats with us this weekend."

Gardener Cutting Tree into 'Rock' Symbol.

Rose Garden

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'