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Computers Anxious about being Replaced by I-Macs

"No wonder you're exhausted. You are manually dialing your phone numbers. I programmed them in for you."

"You created a robot to do your homework for you? Apparently, laziness is the mother of invention."

Haircuts

"String ... you mean it doesn't have a remote controller to operate it?"

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

"I have an imaginary friend called Fred, and my dad has one called Alexa."

'There's nothing on.'

'It's one of these new phones that takes photographs.'

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

"I don't understand it! My nerd detector's going crazy!"

Mouse in a hamster wheel.

"I got a swiss army hook!"

"Again, are you sure I didn't mention about bringing your own 3-D glasses?"

'This computer has a fast modem, the latest Pentium, increased RAM, a huge hard drive and broadband connections. Only one problem...slow pointer fingers.'

"Careful. That house has a taser."

"This new phone app for opening the beer is great, Bruce!"

'Mom! This high resolution screen makes it seem like you're really outdoors!'

'This is suppose to be progress.'

'My new cellphone has a 'self-help' program...'

'NO, it DOESN'T come on DISC!'

'You know, you can do this all online now.'

"Isn't there an app for this?"

"You'll have to excuse my Stuart. He's just showing off his new drill.

"I don't know where to begin, each dish has its own app."

"We should have done more to bring all the things we were trying to get away from."

"We've got the same ringtone!" (Two guys opening ring pull drinks cans).

"This isn't Dublin. It's not even Ireland. Repeat after me, dear: 'I'll never buy a second-hand sat nav as a bargain again.'"

Having moved to a tablet, the farmer's wife was done with mice. . .