Modern Fatherhood Enthusiasts T-Shirts

'Dad, meet CGI Dad.'

'Another expectant father looking forward to paternity leave.'

"So, when he says, 'What a good boy am I,' Jack is really reinforcing his self-esteem."

Believe it or not: Once upon a time Dads couldn't even boil water.

"I couldn't find the phone charger, but I was able to locate all the mouses the kids lost over the years."

'We're playing I'm a mummy with lots of different daddies!'

"I'm used to falling asleep with the TV on. Read me an infomercial."

"How many times do I have to beep you?"

"Go ask your search engine."

"They're a very hi-tech family. Apparently, even their baby was cordless."

'Not today,son-not on Fathers' Day!'

"I was thinking of joining a parenting class."

"Can you wangle me some parental leave?"

"I had a lot more freedom before mom got the drone."

'Until I met your Mom, yes.'

Baby Shower

The day after Father's Day.

'I'm not giving you a lift. If you want to run away from home, run.'

'We got rid of the baby monitor, We just sms the baby 'RUOK''

"My daughter is a modern baby. She doesn't cry when she is hungry...she texts me."

'Here's your choice. Grounded for a week or a walk around the Mall with me while I wear this.'

"And we're just so proud you're walking to school alone. Aren't we, Harold?"

"Dad, if Mom ever has a boyfriend, I hope he's just like you."

Fathers Saluting Each Other.

"Well ok....but in your case I'll need DNA proof!"

'A rocking horse? Boy! What will they think of next?!'

'Congratulations, you're a father. Now you'd better get out of here before her husband arrives.'

'I'm begging you, please don't let me go!'

'In my day we called it 'parenting', not 'troubleshooting your kid'.'

"Let's review cause and effect. Your divorce 10 years ago can't affect your son's zero today."

'With a boss, a wife and three teenaged kids, I haven't had much time to worry about international affairs.'

'I am too the boss of you!'

"Just tell Daddy who hit you, and I will march upstairs and ask Mommy how to handle this!"