Modern Attitudes Prints

"I got rid of all the excess in my life."

"I'm a vegetarian who eats meat."

'It was love at first sight, although he was very pixilated and I was out of focus'

"Eat not of the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge. Its sources have yet to be verified."

Dawing your Cellphone

'I'll have the bacon and hay wrap.'

Selfie Stick

No Immediate Danger

Wasting away again in Cappuccinoville.

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

"That newspaper has been showing up ever since you started reading the news online. I think it feels betrayed."

'Your parents are way too overprotective.'

Final words on gravestones.

"I hear he's taking an experimental drug called, 'It Ain't Over Till It's Over.'"

"I want more than anonymous sex. I want anonymous intimacy."

Book Worm

"You have an air of Camille Paglia about you."

Modern Portrait Gallery

"Communion at the contemporary service is scones and coffee."

"Congratulations, dude, and you may now play tonsil hockey with the bride."

"My parent's think I'm apathetic, but I don't care."

"Sometime I find it hard to believe that we found each other through regular channels."

"Half-full. Those were the days."

This guy is always upbeat and sees the glass as half full. I like riding home like this at the end of the day. It's nice finishing on an optimistic note.

"I may not know art, but I know what I like."

'You'll marry me? Really? Then forget it! I can't be with someone who's standards are that low!'

'Dang it! The gals out here leave little to a feller's imagination.'

"I find if I say we're having hashtag broccoli or hastag brussel sprouts, they are more apt to eat them."

A Stray Curmudgeon in a Field of Perennial Optimists.

"Years ago, there was only one Santa Claus. Now because of genetic engineering, there can be lots of them."

Life begins at 60

'Okay, now I'm hoping he's right...'

'I'm afraid we don't have any gentlemen on hand right now -- how about a good old boy?'

"A messenger from the West Side, Your Highness."

"May I air-quote you?"