Mobile Etiquette Advocate Prints

Mobile Bans

"Turn off cell phones violators will be over ruled."

"You're probably wondering why I called you. It's because I accidentally butt dialed you."

"Remember, I want to hear fifteen solid minutes of small talk before you ask for the Wi-Fi password."

"I'm not repeating the specials again until everyone puts down their phones."

"Be right with you. I need to take this real quick."

Cull people who talk and text during a concert you've paid good money to see.

"This tone means the battery is low. This one means you've just driven over a pedestrian. And this one indicates that someone sitting near you in a coffee shop is about to grab your phone and stuff it down your throat!"

"This circle of hell is for those who always hit Reply to All."

Texting kills

"Why don't you pull over and let us get past, you arrogant self-righteous bastard!"

"Hello? is it me you're looking for?"

'I told you never to Facebook, Bebo, Hotmail, Yahoo, MSN or phone me at work...'

"Ignoring LinkedIn requests is the new 'get lost'."

"How would you like me to answer that question? As a member of my ethnic group, educational class, income group, or religious category?"

His text said, I challenge you to pistols at dawn, and I replied, C U there, and he replied with a thumbs-up emoji – Do I have to reply to that?

"OK, gotta go...hey, why is everyone at my table singing the Hallelujah chorus?"

'Twitter or tweet-free?'

'It's a new idea - a cell phone booth, where people can talk privately without disturbing others.'

"Shoes off sofa... Shoes off sofa... Shoes off sofa..."

''How am I?' Tsk, you people who don't do facebook! I've got to make up a status update especially for you, have I?'

'Coming through!'

Online vs. Offline Behaviour

Tweet Others As You Would Have Them Tweet You.

"Must you look at your phone when I'm talking to you?"

'Put away that damned smartphone!'

"Stop hitting 'Reply All.'"

"He just called without texting first. How can he be 23 and still not know how a phone works?"

I can't believe it's come to his. I'll be glad to give you candy when you're off your cell phone.

Handy Pre-made Notes for Modern Life

'Will that be the constantly looking down at smart phones section or family that talks to each other section?'

A recent study found frequent use of cell phones can present a serious health risk to the incredibly inconsiderate.

Cat informs owner someone unfollowed her on social media.

"I can't talk now - he's right here."

Newly Proposed Phone Regulations.