Misunderstanding Maven T-Shirts

"Oops, this meeting is for Data Cloud Services? I thought it was Dodo the Clown Services!"

'What a silly misunderstanding - you meant I should be home by ten-thirty P.M.?'

'A few more years in this job and you'll learn how to delegate stress.'

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

Drool Marks

"Does anyone here have a clue what it is we used to get?"

"We went for Scandinavian interiors."

"I don't have to be a team player, Crawford. I'm the team owner."

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

"And this is a $20,000 ‘meditation room’ — can you believe it?!!"

Failure/Due Diligence

'I think it's time to rein in Henderson.'

'What can I do to create a climate where things get done?'

'Sorry to interrupt Dixon - but this is not what I meant when I said this company needed more blue-sky thinking!'

"Someone, call the office and see if we can get a fresh carrot."

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

"First of all, let me commend everyone on the teamwork displayed on this icebreaker. Secondly, let me apologize for some of the motivational language I used during this session..."

Man carrying his boss.

"Despite years of management training john still found it difficult to give negative feedback."

The worker/the man who monitors the worker/the man who wrote the draft policy guidelines on how to monitor the man monitoring the worker.

'There's an absence of leadership in this authority,we need to explore the possibility of thinking about setting up a sub-committee to look into it.'

"Tell me more about your imposter syndrome."

"Oh, the crystal ball rolled off and fell right on my foot! Didn't see it coming!"

"I need a pitchfork that's just a pitchfork."

'Office of not much budget, and even less management! Yomp speaking!'

"What kind of crazy management scheme is this?"

"You question my methodology? Perhaps you should question your questionology."

"May I remind you that my core worth as a human being remains constant, and isn't tied to external validation."

'How dare you accuse me of sinking this company?'

'Hmm...this new management fad is crazy enough that it might just work...'

Categories are the key to organizing.

'Attention, all department heads: the buck stops there. I've had it!'