Mistaken Identity Buff Prints

". . . But, hey, man, I just want to say this in all sincerity, man, that you are the greatest, man, you the el numero uno cat in my book, man you. . ."

The Anti-Agent

CSI: Mother Goose Unit...'Hmmm...I'm beginning to suspect that perhaps mister Dumpty's demise wasn't simply a tragic accident.'

Sherlock Holmes selling Sherlock Holmes.

Zoology Class. Test Today. What did you get for the question about Fuzzy Wuzzy?

Round up all the king's horses and all the king's men for questioning.

"First Lady Lettuce goes missing, then Colonel Crouton followed by Reginald Radish... Great Caesar's Ghost! Someone is making a salad!"

"The Hound of the Baskervilles, Watson--I took him walkies!"

Joan Hickson

Before the Internet

"Yup, pretty sure that was a flying squirrel."

'Listen up, Baskerville! This is MacDonald! Those hounds of yours are scaring the E-I-E-I-O out of my animals!'

Igor hesitated - "You give me that silly old brain, and i'll give you these magic beans!"

The Philip Marlow family

The Da Vinci Cod

'I don't know much about history, don't know much biology ... but we'll be OK if there's a round on song lyrics.'

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

'I'm 3 years old - that's 21 dog years - so start pouring!'

'You can all relax and resume your game. The unattended bag discovered on the infield turned out to be the second base.'

Academic Jeopardy - "The great unknowns and cosmic uncertainties of the universe are reduced by this number daily."

"I started my career as an industrial spy-here."

"I'm Rapunzel. You want Juliet – next tower over."

Quiz Night...

Switch on brain

'The good news is your life sentence is about over.'

"Sorry, I meant to say "good luck", not "break a leg"..."

"The official measure of an inch is three iPhones stacked on top of each other."

Milkin' Impossible

I read on Candorville.com that was rank 29,705th in the world when it comes to attention spans. What? Aren't there only 196 countries? The article didn't just include human countries. It included the various animal kingdoms and the plant republics. Did you know that Americans have an eight-second attention span ... but the goldfish who live in little Lionel Brown's aquarium kingdom at 1492 MLK Way in Candorville have a nine-second attention span? Are you sure you weren't reading a humor column?

'Is that a suspicious package in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?'

'Did you know there's a river in Brazil named after Amazon?'

Glasses on, Crazy Cowman's secret identity was safe

By the year 2500, 1 in 10 academics will devote their entire career to divining the meaning of the word 'sussudio'.

'I just have an eerie feeling about this cave.'

"According to stomach content analysis he'll be dead in half an hour."