Mindful Mathematician T-Shirts

'How would you describe yourself?'

"What I do is pick up the morning paper, go through it carefully, and then, depending on how I feel about things, I either say the Pledge of Allegiance, stand there and do nothing, or walk out of the classroom."

"Oh, stop it. You are not at all obtuse." Complimentary angles make the other angles feel good about themselves.

"Live in the sunshine, swim in the sea, drink in the wild air." — Ralph Waldo Emerson "Catch tennis balls in the mouth." — Me

"I have a recurring nightmare that I've taken a test, and the professor won't give me an 'A'."

"Is this a 'GOTCHA' question?"

"I change my mantra every two months so no one can hack my soul."

I want a calendar where every day says here and now

'I don't know why Doc, but my life is really upside down...'

"Don’t think of that tennis ball as lost. Think of it as finally free."

The power of the brain

"I think I've finally figured out who's on first."

'I'm beginning to think outside the box again - get my GP quickly!'

"You are responsible for editing your thoughts. I'm just here to audit them."

Binary Meditation.

"You what? Well, you darn well ought to have a guilt complex"

'Your problems are caused by all-or- nothing thinking. It's either that, or you don't have any problems.'

'I always answer their questions with a question - it drives them nuts!'

"I worry that some people find me boring"

Internal Prisons

"People can bridge the great distance between the Earth and the Moon..."

"I'm doing better. The voices in my head can now access my email."

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with worrying that you forget something."

'I don't know how you stand listening to people's problems all of the time, Doctor Barnes.'

"O.K., God – please delete everything I said today."

"The alarm will alert us when our meditative, present-moment-restoring tech break has ended."

"Hmmm?!"

"Are we allowed to pray?"

'You're insecure because your data is unsecured.'

Mathematics.

'Too expensive, too long, sounds boring, the jacket is lousy...'

Jim was busy detoxing his negative thinking patterns.