Messy Room Strategist Gifts

"But mom, everything is put away. Just imagine that my room is one big draw."

"There, all neat and tidy!"

"Never mind rehearsing for your first year at Uni. Get up now!"

Newborn Chaos

"Until you clean you room, I'm confiscating your iPod, your Xbox and your jester!"

"But mom, I can't clean my room now. I just won the Kids Bedroom Seal of Approval!"

Two bored males hanging out on a tatty sofa.

'Now, you'd better pick up your toys or no bath!'

Ask Sadie. Actual questions from actual readers! Send your questions to asksadie@rudypark.com. Dear Ask Sadie, My mom is always nagging me to clean my room. I don't see why I should have to. I like it the way it is. I don't nag at her for having a clean room, because I know that's how she likes it. How can I get her to just let me be me? - Unhappy at Home. Excellent question. The thing is, it's your mother's job to shape you into a respectable person. If you think "being you" includes being dirt

"Bird of paradise, my ass."

'How can he remember 37 passwords but always forget to pick his clothes up off the floor?'

'You should apply for government relief. Your room is a disaster area!'

"Mum, I can't find my camouflage jacket."

"Dear Ask Sadie, My mom is always nagging me to clean my room. I don't see why I should have to. I like it the way it is. I don't nag at her for having a clean room, because I know that's how she likes it. How can I get her to just let me be?" "Excellent question. The thing is, it's your mother's job to shape you into a respectable person." "If you think 'being you' includes being dirty, that means you're a dirty, slovenly filth-beast..." "...who will end up alone and miserable because no liv

A dog locks a man out and sleeps in his bed.

Pardon me! My being born was your idea, not mine!

"Junior must be in here somewhere."

A 'Life is Sweet!' Moment

"Try the fancy new coffee machine. It's part of the school's new teacher retention program."

"Inspiration"

Antisocial distancing

"Your room isn't a rubbish tip! go and mess it up now!!"

A couple look at a graph on their bed

Playing The Youth Card

'It's hard to believe her biggest passion is for a cleaner environment.'

Businesspeople gather in bedroom setting 'They can't regulate us in here.'

"Ralphie sold me his car alarm."

I thought I told you to straighten your room. (Originally published on 2008-01-08).

"I don't know what he's protesting, but he's been on a cleaning strike ever since I married him."

"Nice try, but you can't blame a messy room on standardized testing."

"The endless string of budget cuts are making things impossible. It's the worst part of this job. Having to spread so much time with people at the very end of their tether...people with no hope, no optimism for the future...people in a state of despair! A

'Teachers' lounge.'

'We gave you ample opportunity to clean your room, Billy. Now its been sealed off.'

'Assault on Mount Stinky...now that's a big adventure.'

"Both of you are rotten and hateful—from a kid's perspective."