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"Try thinking about something else."

Good shrink, bad shrink.

"Memoir, Chapter 1. At times, I think I may have never fully gotten over the death of my parents..."

'You look like you have a lot on your mind, Jim!'

'On the outside I'm all ho-ho-ho. But inside I feel weak and shaky, like a bowl full of jelly.'

"It's Bring Your Personal Demons to Work Day."

"In this plant we bottle soft drinks, Tim, not our emotions."

'Visualize yourself not falling off the wall.'

"If you're happy and you know it, stick with your dosage."

"I don't think this is doing me any good."

'He just snapped.'

"He says I'm too clingy."

'So tell me, what is it about your life that isn't making sense to you.'

'And how old were you when your mother first called you a scaredy cat.'

"You say I can move mountains? Right now,it's all I can do to turn over a new leaf!"

'Ignore me, it's just my nut allergy.'

Dementia - the lighter side,

'In a bizarre set of circumstances, the book salesman never showed up, but a drug rep is here with samples of Prozac.'

"You have the right to remain silent – but, it would be helpful to know what you think."

"... Sorry. What was that about people not listening to you?"

Life Sucks.

'You lost your home and farm. Do you want to talk about it?

Positive mentality

"I'm only in it for the money. Is that normal?"

Uncanny. Like the weather girl was speaking directly to him, and him alone.

'Every Night the same dream. I have to file for chapter 11, but can't afford the filing fee!'

"Good news, you don't have imposter syndrome - you really are a good boy."

Beware of Obsessive-Compulsive Dog.

'I preferred it before you started taking Prozac.'

'To be honest, my work paid for this session and I really just needed the rest.'

'My - I don't remember my second-grade Christmas play dealing with post-holiday depression.'

'You're right... I'm not a good listener. That's why my rates are so low.'

Pull Yourself Together.

'Actually, the bill is part of your reality therapy.'

'Tell me about your feelings of alienation.'