
"It's not a pain reliever, but it resembles one. It's called Acetametaphor."
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"It's not a pain reliever, but it resembles one. It's called Acetametaphor."
Surgeon finds a doohickey on the patient's thingamabob.
"The bottle says that 'Extreme Hair Growth' is a rare side effect of this medication."
"We need to update your entire operating system."
"Your test results are in...now the interpretations can begin."
'The doctors all tell me that you have great medical insurance. They think your coverage might last through most of the tests that they have scheduled.'
Man with arrow in back - "We're going to run some tests to see if it's psychosomatic."
"We're doing everything we can to make him comfortable, short of dressing up as male doctors."
"The biopsy on your mole came back negative, which is positive, which is good."
'...but besides this, how are you doing?'
Cures for Ye Plague
First clue that the latest medical breakthrough isn't quite there yet - 'Don't worry, I had the same thing...'
'Like I said - It's non invasive surgery.'
'I know just how you feel.'
"Relax, I'm only hear to see my osteopath."
'Why are you giving me an allergy shot. Shouldn't you be giving me an anti-allergy shot?'
'Even I didn't realize it was a disease.'
"I had no idea that exercising my right of immunity meant this."
'We can't determine if you're telling the truth, but you should have a doctor check your pressure.'
Fart Sample.
"Hibernation sounds old fashioned. Now we call it binge sleeping."
Water: the first medicine
'Yes we can cure you - but the bigger problem now is: can you afford it?'
'Key hole surgery....but wouldn't it be easier if you were actually in the room with me...'
"Milton finally found a doctor he can trust - one who still believes in the healing power of money."
Doctor consulting a textbook.
'Lucky for you there was a safety net.'
"Your D.N.A. test shows you're predisposed to sue doctors."
'To avoid lawsuits, we articulate in medicalese that most mortals could not render intelligible.'
"I'm from Special Ops."
Consultation of Physicians.
Morty likes a holistic approach... sex, cigarettes, pillow talk and then death.
"Now where was I?"
NYer uploaded by mod - Pistachio Terminology 2022
"Stiff neck, blurred vision, and Carpal Tunnel Syndrome, all due to extended time in front of a computer. I think I just discovered the ICD-10 code for my job!"
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