Medical Mishap Storyteller T-Shirts

Barbeque Casualty.

"It's a narrative I didn't intend."

Cranial-Metal Plate Surgery Centre

'Under blood type, sir, could you be a little more specific than blue?'

"And as if that wasn't bad enough. They've discovered that I'm allergic to bandages!"

"At least she got it to squeak when she tripped over it."

"Not dead, nonsense! According to the computer you are dead! . . . Please don't waste anymore of out valuable time and leave the operating room!"

'I can't turn it off.'

OPERATING ROOM, 'Your husband may have a little trouble sleeping for awhile -- we spilled some coffee in him.'

"The operation was a huge success, Mr. Smith, but we're going to have to open you up again - we appear to have lost a nurse."

'It appears you've arrived here because of some medical gobbledygook, so, to put it simply, you can now go home.'

'How's my Surger? Call 1-600 Lawsuit.'

"I'm certain you're fine, but my attorney would like to see you naked."

'Ok, Ms. Feldman, it says on your chart that you were discharged yesterday.'

'Wait a minute! Didn't I see you on 'Funniest Medical Bloopers and Blunders'?'

Paramedic Mistakes.

'Get a time release capsule stuck in your throat again?'

"Well... the good news is we've dealt with your ingrowing toenail..!"

"And do you get a shooting pain between your eyes?"

"When I yell 'CLEAR' that doesn't mean you."

CITY HOSPITAL, 'It's all right, officer -- I'm an outpatient.'

"I believe I told you quite clearly not to let his stitches get wet."

'Mr. Jayson, get back into your bandages.'

'Try not to make this doctor nervous ? this will be his first operation.'

Dr. Mooglum made two mistakes. First, he stuck the stethoscope on the patient's forehead, and secondly, he replaced the end with a suction cup.

'He accidentally brushed his teeth with hemorrhoid-shrinking cream.'

Broken hospital sign.

'I'm afraid its a classic case of seaside blowback.'

Sorry, you rolled off the table just as I was going in!