Medical Finance Grappler Pillows

'There's only one side effect from this medication. It starts when you don't pay my bill!'

The Jeopardy of Progress

Pinocchio's Second Realization

Secretive Weigh In.

"Your test results are back. We're going to have to remove your appendix and your wallet."

Why you must go to work

'Today I invested in some Chinese stocks, but I felt greedy again in an hour.'

Doctor's poker.

"On the one hand, we'll burn in hell; on the other, that's a lot of money."

"But Doctor - will the government pay for Ferris Buelleritis?"

"I'm sorry, Mr Percival, but what you've got is not economically treatable."

"Those image resolutions are crystal clear, but it's my New Year's resolutions that are getting pretty fuzzy."

Man about to pay his hospital bill notices a team of doctors and nurses waiting to resuscitate him.

'Double or nothing on the second opinion, Doc?'

"Reimbursements are still shrinking - billing sent us the latest payment to read."

"All the government wants to do is push our buttons!"

"I don't want treatment, just an insurance estimate."

Public Safety Notice: Hold the Handrail/Public Hygiene Notice: Do Not Hold The Handrail

'When does the plaster come off?'

"It says here you've got a high threshold of pain. I'm going to present you with your bill now."

'Give it to me straight, Mr. Tomano. . .can you pay me?'

Donald Came Out Of The Recovery Room This Morning But Had To Go Back After Seeing The Bill.

'You must be seriously ill. They've called in your accountant.'

'I would like to see you lower the numbers on your blood pressure, cholesterol and delinquent doctor bills.'

"The nice part is you're in the right place for resucitation if you pass out from the bill."

'Hey, if you deduct the costs of taxation, regulation, and malpractice insurance, this visit only cost you two bucks!'

A man is fishing and a large hook descends from the sky with money as bait.

"You feel like a million bucks? Great! I'll tell our billing department"

'Your credit rating is poor to fair. I'd like to get that up a bit.'

'Because of your inadequate insurance coverage, your baby arrived C.O.D.'

"Reaching for your wallet at the front desk, however, should be no problem!"

"I'll go shop around for a doctor."