Mediation Specialist T-Shirts

'Apparently Wednesday is early conciliation day.'

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

Brian wanted to call the presentation "Synergy". Paula wanted to call it "Cooperation". They could never agree.

"Another job well done by your conflict resolution specialist."

'I'm glad you guys could work this out in a reasonable manner.'

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

"They're having a fight over how best to handle client conflict."

"When faced with a tricky ethical issue, I always ask the question, 'What's in it for me?'"

"Then we have an unspoken agreement?"

Growl - Hiss Conflict Resolution Meeting

'You think I'm crazy; I think you're crazy...finally some common ground!'

'We're making progress. I just got a firm 'maybe'.'

'Hey, look, I can stand up and shout, too!'

'Try and be negative in a positive way.'

Dialogue

"That's the last time I'm going to allow politics to be discussed in the office."

'The toughest things you have to deal with in this job, is feelings and lawyers.'

"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."

Tug of Negotiation and Conciliation.

'Ok, here's the meeting agenda ... it's gonna be a long one.'

'Negotiations have reached an impasse, legal recommends we resort to violence.'

Changing Minds

'How did the 'I want you all to take a pay cut or leave' strategy go down?'

Collective Psyche

'Three weeks of brutal alimony negotiations, Polly, and you settle for a cracker!'

Lies/Damned Lies/Social Media

'Now that we've learned to talk, maybe we should establish some speech codes.'

Ruddy bloggers!

"Tom, I’d like you to meet Chris. Chris is better than you."

'With these video-phones, there's just too much documentation on all my promises.'

"At least we agree to disagree."

'This rift between you and Dr. Voight has become a chasm.'

'Stop emailing me, I am standing right here.'

'Hi! I'm on the tree.'

"Helen, I have decided to seek a change of venue, since it has grown increasingly obvious that I can no longer get a fair trial in this household."