Media Aware Parent Pillows

"Did you accidentally put the DVD of 'Taxi Driver' in her 'Wheels on the Bus' case?"

Hate Platforms

Lynching on social media

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

'Don't leave baby alone with this really cool tiny phone. It's a choking hazard.'

"We realize that kids start using technology at a younger age these days, so our strollers come with Bluetooth, Wi-Fi and GPS."

The Digital Family

"The moral of the story, honey, is that being a celebrity does not make you a credible children’s book author."

"We're so proud. Only 5 months old and already knows how to scroll and swipe."

"Getting dark, Sweetie. Better text Mom you love her."

'Don't worry about the thumb sucking...she'll be texting with it soon enough.'

Rumors, lies and innuendo.

"Don't worry about her sucking her thumb. Soon she'll be texting with it."

"I'm used to falling asleep with the TV on. Read me an infomercial."

"What do you think is a good step goal for someone who's just started walking?"

The Expert

James Gandolfini in his driveway with a tablet

"So that's two votes for save and one for delete."

'Yes, technology has come a long way, but the baby won't have a touch screen.'

'So tell me again. Why can't you sit on the eggs and tweet at the same time?'

'It's no use! His computer tablet has replaced his blanky!'

"I hope you're not reading fake news."

"Well, Sara Kalen is wrong – Edward Snowden is not a 'tattletale.'"

'Have you googled me to see how old I was when I was born?'

"All this time I've been trying to get her to walk, and all it took was a phone."

'It's a book, Sweetie - it doesn't have any ram!'

"How many times do I have to beep you?"

"I figure we can blue-screen the kids in later."

'I don't understand your question. Could you restate it as an answer?'

'My teacher sends report cards as PDF attachments. Luckily, my parents have no idea how to open computer files.'

'I don't care if an app on your phone is monitoring you, you still need a baby sitter when your father and I are gone.'

'Your son stopped passing notes to his friends in class. Now he's text messaging them.'

"Go ask your search engine."

Newborn Uses Smartphone To Send His Dad A Text Message.

'Sorry, sweetie -- they're not that kind of cookies.'