Mechanical Metaphor Enthusiast T-Shirts

'Okay, start it up.'

Relationship counselor: 'She started behaving strangely, and our man-machine interface has become unpredictable.'

Electric Blanket.

'If I was this car I wouldn't let you in the drivers seat!'

Poetry repairman

'Your car should run fine now. I reformatted the hard drive, increased the ram, scanned for viruses, updated the firmware, upgraded to this year's processor...'

'I think I've got a screw loose.'

"You've got a few screws loose."

Every time one of us gets a new head, those two think it's funny to call it "the changing of the gourd."

'Do you, Edward, promise to play second fiddle and also pay the piper?'

Greasy toothbrush. One of the downsides to life with the bionic man.

A horse and cart metamorphosing into a snail.

'I think I found your missing nut.'

The Rarely Seen Gas-Powered Eel

'Batteries not included, it's a real cat.'

'That's the problem with absolute power, Sire. It corrupts absolutely. And it always seems to start with the fenders and door panels.'

"They said it had a V-8, so I assumed it would run on tomato juice!"

"One CC of lubricant after meals, okay?"

'Try it now.'

Hard-working.

“It's just a song. We don’t have to climb every mountain.”

"I'm not sure you see my point of view..." "From down here I'd say that's probably true!"

"The replacement part is $28, but cost will be $3,200 after we dismantle half the engine to install it."

WD40

It's only firing on 87 cylinders.

'M.O.T. certificate?!...a death certificate's the best I can do.'

Car Carriage

An Incendiary in the Loft

"My only suggestion is we freeze it and hope a future generation can repair it."

Old Macdonald's Farm Van making Chug Chug and other noises.

I think it's your suspension!

'Tow trunk lifting itself..'

"Your husband's going to pull through, but your differential is shot!"

Unnatural Food-nuts and bolts, sale on junk foods, rusty nuts, bolts, and screws.

'It refuses to stop at garage sales!'