Meat Industry Professional T-Shirts

'Acme Meat - meat products, bi-products, and bi-product spinoffs...'

"If you ask me hog futures don't look very promising."

Cow's Last Will and Testament.

Important Food Groups

"What if, instead of the safe being filled with rawhide, it's filled with catnip and mice!" "No one will buy it." "Drugs and rodents? Who's our demographic?" "The Simpsons already did that."

"We have; pulled pork, enticed chicken, persuaded lamb, bullied beef, cajoled Turkey..."

'I told you it wouldn't work.'

Cow being force fed hormones and producing milk.

'Can't stand diary products myself, but a job's a job.'

A butcher announcing he will kill his own meat

"May I offer you a side of life insurance?"

"What do you have that won't kill me?"

A boy who loves cows/burgers

"And that's where hot dogs come from."

Family Butcher.

*=Hotdog

"Please stay on the line – your caul is important to us."

"You know, it really wasn’t that bad."

I assure you the animals didn't suffer. All of our meat comes from animals who died naturally of old age while vacationing in Miami.

'You wouldn't believe how hard it is for me to unwind after work.'

Down on Her.

"When I grow up I'd like to model for a pasta company."

"Veal or non-veal?"

'It's getting harder every day to make a living at this.'

Pigs at butcher: 'One day son, all this will be you..'

'The dept. of agriculture says yes, the environmental protection agency says maybe, and the food and drug administration says no.'

"Appetizer is almost done."

'I overheard the farmer say I have a future at McDonalds.'

Red Square. He's an important man, the caviar chief for the whole country. I still think he could have laughed when I call him the "Sturgeon General." I (heart) Moscow.

Angry Bulls about to try out their version of Butchering on an unsuspecting Butcher

Nothing sweeter than seeing an old couple holding hams.

The Butcher of 35th street.

'I'm all for GM food, it's done wonders for my profit margins!'

Vlad the Impaler - The Later Years.

'Bovine Growth Hormone.'