Meal Transformation Enthusiast Gifts

Before/After

Domestic Goddess.

"It's how he would have wanted to go."

Vegetarian Birds

Making healthy substitutions at mealtime

"There must be a place we can wait on line for an hour before eating."

'Meat cooked, but carrots still hard.' Hand in pot

'They're not mints - they're antacid tablets.'

'I can't have you spending all of your money on fancy restaurants like this, Jeff.'

The Aisle

'I love it when you cook - it lets me practice faking it.'

'In case of emergency, break glass.'

"I've been a chef for far too long...."

'Mine was stone cold.'

'After you with the camouflage.'

'Which are the most popular and least popular items, and which have been on the menu the longest and shortest times?'

'There's something wrong with the slow cooker. I check it every minute but nothing's cooking!'

'You'll find loaves in the pantry and fishes in the freezer.'

'Howard's short stay in the hospital was good for both of us. He finally appreciates my cooking.'

Tsunami in the cooking pot.

'Help! -- I ate too much and I can't get up!'

"Every time my wife has an accident in the kitchen, I end up eating it. . ."

"First, finish that genetically modified asparagus. Then you can have ice cream full of bovine growth hormone."

'VEGETARIAN ZOMBIES' colour

"Still workin' on that, sir?"

"So does this Flamingo diet have any side effects?"

"And there it is... Coronation chicken"

'The health plate is low in sodium, cholesterol, and sugar -- the downside is that it's high in styrofoam.'

"Our food supervisor used to be a military cook."

"I need to get back in the gym."

'This is Muriel's kitchen, where the magic happens -- you know, Voodoo and stuff like that.'

'Your meal should be along shortly. Frank just went out to hunt it.'

"I gave your ‘compliments to the chef,’ and he’d like you to elaborate."

'Your trouble is that you don't appreciate good food.'

Your Dinner Is In The Potato Skin