Start their day with a mug that celebrates masculinity debates—witty, clever, and perfect for pouring coffee and sparking conversation about what it means to be a man.
Many of you were confused about the "Randy's How to be an Alpha" lesson from yesterday: "Live like you've got nothing to lose." You know what? I don't care. If you don't get it, that's on you. If you want to hang out with the big dog, either keep up or get left behind. I hope that demonstration clears up the confusion. If not, I couldn't care less.
"Man-to-man talk, Randy." "Proceed, friend." "If you were being audited, and you may have accidentally burned all your receipts and ledgers...would it be manlier to run away to a country that has no extradition treaty with the ours, or to weasel out of it by ratting out an even bigger tax cheat?" "Or, would it be manlier to frame the auditor for a crime he didn't commit?" "Gonna have to take a day to think about this one."
Changing Minds
"No. I don't want to see an all-male production of 'Little Women.' "
Gas: Regular/Hi-Test/Testosterone
'My dad is pushing me to become an alpha male, but frankly, I'd rather be a poet...'
"We need to hire more women."
Desk Organizers: 'He Said' and 'She Said'.
"Well...this constant badness is just sooo wearisome...."
"Even Voldemort wouldn't drown a whole planet."
"Are you sure this is in your job description?"
'Are they street legal, and do you have some insecurity thing going on?'
I saw that! Saw what? You just had tears in your eyes. The end of the movie made you cry! Did not. Why not just admit it? What's the big deal? It was a sad movie and you cried. It happens to everyone. You think you're above normal emotions? Are you better than the rest of us?! No. Fine, okay. It was sad. Maybe my eyes were a little moist. Girly man! Look at the crying girly man! Can't win.
'Billy, I'm not going to argue the semantics of biting. Whether or not you penetrated skin, I'm calling your mother.'
"In my day, if you colluded with anyone, Dad went for his belt."
The girl with the most curves.
'I'm beginning to think our flock has discovered the grass is greener the other side of the fence...'
'What would the world be like without women? Well there'd be no people for a start.'
'Well £60 million is LESS than I'm used to...but now that we've agreed my bonus, what working capital will the Bank have?'
'And only enough blood to work one at a time.'
Cops at domestic scene with the Hickenloopers.
Line for the women's restroom vs. line for the men's restroom
Macho fishing.
Destinations
You talk about gender equality but you rejected my application! Shame on you, Femen!
"It might be considered a hate crime, so tell me honestly. Did you shoot your husband because of his gender?"
"It's hard to say there are more dopey men than women - they're just more obvious."
"O.K., let's confront the issues of masculinity!"
"'Macho Soap'! For the house husband who wants red, raw, rough hands!"
'Macho man - you're out! We want a different image. . . We're using a 'new' man now - sensitive, gentle, debonair. . .and here he comes.'
Evidence that women are more intelligent than men. . .
"We aim to win the battle of the sexes."
Studies in Social Progress No. 12
Transvestite restrooms.
'In my experience, for good to triumph over evil, it needs a little help from the NEUTRAL.'
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