Married Life Historian T-Shirts

"What's wrong dear? I haven't heard a single complaint out of you all morning."

"No, no - it was great. It's just that sometime I'd like to try it missionary style."

"I didn't complain, when you crashed the computer."

'It's really more of a family forest than a family tree.'

Several generations live together in Cuba

"In my life, I've had seven cars, six jobs, five houses, four bypass operations, and three wives!"

"I feel like pushing the envelope this morning, honey, starting with a little grape jelly for that bran muffin."

Family DNA

'Ha! Ha! The Wooin' O't!'

"Could you tell me how to get to cedar grove, New Jersey? I want to see where my grandfather was born."

"Why mum, I didn't know that you had written a book."

'We were thinking of naming him after his daddy, but I don't really like the name, Old slap head.'

Adam and Eve: Reconcilable Differences

'The big feet come from your side of the family.'

"These are my fish cymbalta, otezla, skyrizi, vraylar and stelara!"

'The suspense is killing us. Which one is our grandchild?'

"Hey. Whatever happened to our sexual relations? "

"You're writing a memoir? You're seven years old. Do you honestly think you can capture the interest of readers with such a short—wait, is that my name?!"

Changes at home

'It was romantic before we had kids. Build some stairs.'

'That's a picture of my granddad with shoulder length hair and a beard. That's why mom calls these albums hair looms.'

'Seriously!? ... Well it's apparent I didn't marry a handyman.'

"Darling, you never let me see the side of you that pays."

Estate Sale! All the stuff my kids said they don't want to inherit.

'And thanks be to the lord that we're going out to eat on Friday...'

'Here comes the Papa-razzi again...'

'Well, isn't this nice? Three generations all sitting down together.'

It's my biggest project - a database of all my sister's boyfriends.

'I'm tired of roaming the earth. Can we just stay home tonight?'

"Meeting old relatives...is like peeking into our future."

Another Filibuster from the Secretary of the Interior of My Car

'There's an app you can program to delete your trash? I've had one for years called Dave.'

"I had a great weekend... My Grandpa talked about the war again and my Dad about his most daring facebook comments!"

"Oh, how I wish the season would start!"

Are your parents here? Spring play! I can't tell.