Marriage Satire Collector T-Shirts

"And just where do you think you're going?"

"Will you stand by him through humiliating revelation after humiliating revelation, and then-once you're sure it couldn't possibly get any worse-when even more humiliating revelations come to light?"

"Hell, George - they even miss ME!"

"If you get married at the Grammy Awards, can your marriage be annulled at the Country Music Awards?"

"Yes ... no!"

The finer points of marriage.

'I ask myself-do I really want to sleep on the edge of the bed again?'

"My God—I've forgotten the number of my Swiss bank account!"

'Someday, son, 50 of this will belong to your ex-wife,'

"...for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death or litigation do you part?"

Slave Drivers.

"I never thought I'd get married again."

My boss is a real turd.

"It is as I feared, Mr. Moran. It's definitely a stiff upper lip."

'The marriage counseling session didn't help -- she still claims she never saw me before in her life.'

"You are the weakest wink...goodbye."

'Congratulations, you're now man and wife. You may club the bride. '

"When I said 'I'm leaving' this morning I meant for the office"

'Finally, an objective way to decide who to promote around here.'

Introducing Peter's Cousin - Murray Pan - The Boy Who Refused To Stay A Child

"Of course I got rid of him...in my own way."

'Those are to increase my mental energy. . . Those are a mild sedative to calm my nerves.'

"See that guy over there? Used to be a real headliner."

'I hope everyone saw the ATM installed in the entrance.'

'Well, your income looks good, and you've been on your job for over two years... but it seems you're 15 trillion dollars in debt.'

'I'm concerned. I enjoy paying taxes.'

"Sure you defeated the dragon, but too bad you didn't bring a vaccine."

'Yes sire, we are dealing with your invoice at this very minute.'

Spark Notes Wedding Vows

'Taking guard' 'The pessimist'

'Layoffs are bad enough without you making them play musical chairs.'

'You seem to have rather a lot of unexplained wealth when it comes to tempting, Mr Satan...'

'We're hoping to get enough for the boss to take early retirement.'

'When the economy improves, you will get your company car back.'