Markets Pillows

Madame Borigard: Reader of the Occult - Derivatives & Credit Default Swaps Explained

'In a Washington economic summit, a panel of three economists offered two dozen opinions about the direction of global economics.'

Sign says 'False Sense of Security only $5', customer says 'Can I swap you for a fool hardy lack of concern?

'You were in commodities - cattle, stuff like that - so you must feel right at home here.'

Flea Market.

"Today stocks rose on the news that 'down' is a temporary state of mind."

'Stop that gloating!'

Fresh Prunes (Plums crossed out).

"Washing instructions...don't"

'As expected, your shares of de ja vu are rebounding, again.'

Masochists' Investment Club - today's topic: 'no pain, no gain'.

Farmers' Market

'Since we all have to believe in something, I thought, 'Why not money?''

All reduced 10...The prices? No, the vegetables.

Farmers' Market. Farmer says: 'Get off my land!'

Weight of the law will be in metric.

An August Bank-Holiday in the East End.

'Seriously Bob - we might as well be selling salt.'

'What makes you think they're modern fakes?'

Dow Jones drop

Daytrader - 'One Tuesday for three Sundays.'

'Don't believe a word of it. He got me at the fish market.'

BUY NOTHING NOW - 'Must be your lucky day today, sir!''

Be thankful we didn't invest social security funds in the stock market.

Daytrader.

Flea Market:'Won't be a minute...I'm just going for a top-up.'

'Do you want someone to help you or do you just want someone to hold your hand?'

Customer Convention

No street trading.

'Of course, in the long term we're all extinct.'

'This is the 'Mother Flame' - three for a pound down the market.'

sign says'Headaches only $5', 'I was actually after more of a hangover..'

Adam's apples.

'Locally? Take a look at where this license plate is from.'

"I don't know how the competition are finding out our secrets!"