Marital Cartoon Enthusiast T-Shirts

"How can you feel threatened by someone young enough to be your sullen, uncommunicative daughter?"

"The yellow spotted green bird, eats its body weight in bugs, and mates once every three years."

'Wait a minute - How do we break a tie?'

Old West Bounty Hunter.

"Yes, I've made three resolutions - not to drink less, not to stop watching football on telly and not to spend more time at your mother's."

'Looks like the Wentworths are still on the outs.'

'In sickness and in health, under affordable health care or unaffordable. . .'

'As your solicitor I must ask you to consider divorce an option of last resort. We could mount a drone strike against your husband at a fraction of the cost.'

"It's about time you finished the wall, Herbet...that's your problem, you never finish anything you start!"

"Hang on, I'll get him for you."

"What do you mean I never take you anywhere? We're here, aren't we?"

Don & DixieKiss No. 274385

'My wife likes it when I help out in the kitchen.'

"No heroic measures."

'It started with between-meal snacks -- now he's having between-snack noshes.'

'We can't get a divorce... we haven't paid for the wedding.'

"Would it kill you to help around the house for once?!"

'You were nagging your husband all over the road. I'll need to see your marriage license.'

'What did I say to annoy you? I may want to say it again.'

African plains - not the prettiest of African animals.

"You never tell me you love me." "I told ya' once. I'll let you know if anything changes."

Dog to person whose legs are sticking out of doghouse: 'Which important date did you forget this time, Jeff?'

'My wife! The therapist we hired to help us reinvigorate our marriage!'

"I now pronounce you guilty."

'You're becoming so distant, Els!'

"Is that your answer for everything...fold in a stick of butter?"

'He's probably charming the pants off your receptionist'

"'Till death do you part?"

"We just don't seem to make time for one another these days."

'you should know my wife thinks I'm stupid.'

'We're doing so well together: What do you think of me becoming monogamous?'

'Wait...if you leave me, can I come too?'

"If you two lovebirds could wrap it up I'd like to pee there please and thank you."

"I'm starting to miss his begging."

"I'm so sorry, I never meant for you to find out this way."