Mandate Maven T-Shirts

'He had it coming to him - he didn't follow government guidelines.'

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

Jack of all trades

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

Apples for sale

"Obviously some people here don't appreciate the gravity of our situation."

'We want everyone to remember our name.'

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

"I'm razzled, but not dazzled."

'A few more years in this job and you'll learn how to delegate stress.'

"So then the VP of Sales looks right at me and says 'Larry, what's going on? We don't have any traction in the market.' Like it's MY fault!"

"#Win!"

Drool Marks

Creative department

'Let me see your portfolio of stolen ideas.'

"Does anyone here have a clue what it is we used to get?"

'We're holding our own, but I'd really like to see some growth.'

"One of the most compelling graphic presentations I've ever seen!"

'How did the 'I want you all to take a pay cut or leave' strategy go down?'

'Let's keep in mind that although quitters never win, they often manage to avoid litigation.'

Direct Marketing...

'Okay, okay, be patient!'

"Business is booming! Come in and see our explosive sales today!"

The bad news is our boxer shorts are still bursting into flames. The good news is our brand recognition is through the roof

"I don't have to be a team player, Crawford. I'm the team owner."

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

Trade Show Sherpas

'I think it's time to rein in Henderson.'

'What can I do to create a climate where things get done?'

Real Estate Krisp Flakes: Location! Location! Location!