Makeup Gifts

"Who's a pretty girl now?"

You remember this the next time you buy cotton balls.

"Our foundation covers up just about anything ??" aside from childhood trauma."

'Be ready in a minute - just have to put on my face.'

"And I'll have my usual - 'Mutton dressed as lamb'!"

"Beauty comes from within."

'I need a good concealer. I've got a lot of emotional leakage.'

'Real men have died out,,,there are only softies left,'

For heavens sake,put some make-up on!

"I couldn't find a nail file, like you asked, so I brought you some nail polish and lip gloss instead."

"I refuse to discuss my selfless passion for public service until my hair, makeup and lighting are perfect."

'I wouldn't be caught dead in this shade!'

'Now I look like Mummy!'

Puffin applying makeup to its beak (to attract a mate).

'Why is it women spend hours plucking their eyebrows...then spend hours penciling them back in again!'

'That new concealer works great!'

'We're too late for the Xmas Eve shindig but if you hurry we can just about make the New Year Eve one!'

Whatever look you were aiming for..you missed!

'Why is it you spend hours plucking out your eyebrows...Then you draw them back in again

'Here's my fail proof way to restore a youthful appearance - a 30 watt bulb.'

'I'd really like to do something about these spots.'

After an argument they always kissed and made up.

"Well, yes it fits. But since I've seen her without her make up and glad rags, I'm not sure I still fancy her."

'We need some new faces around here, people, so this Thursday I've scheduled each and every one of you for a complete makeover.'

Holstein spotting kit.

'Well if you can't make me look like Cameron Diaz, just re-apply my lipstick and touch-up my mascara thanks.'

'Easy with the make-up, dear- we don't want you looking like a wino, do we!!'

"Easy on the cosmetics, dear. Use just enough so people say, 'See, you don't need makeup!'"

Batman applying make-up

"I hardly recognized you without makeup."

'Now I look like Mummy!'

The Texas Chainsmoker's Mascara.

Male Green Beret applying face camouflage - female Green Beret applying lipstick.

'I hope you make it with your boyfriend. Now, can we please finish this removal job?'

'Sorry. It just got away from me.'