Magic Buffs T-Shirts

'We're cutting back, so I can only grant you a whim'

'Sire, your new fortress was fine for your nephew's fifth, but I fear it is set for a sterner test.'

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

Knight Golfing

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

"I have to rest. The 'check engine' light on my activity tracker just came on."

Missing You.

"Our focus group will butcher your focus group."

"To begin with, I would like to express my sincere thanks and deep appreciation for the opportunity to meet with you. While there are still profound differences between us, I think the very fact of my presence here today is a major breakthrough."

"Oh look Pharaoh a miniature replica of your final resting place."

"Frank, I want you to try antidepressants."

"Say! While I'm off in the Holy Land, why don't you find a little crusade of some kind that interests you?"

"Very few people are aware that the 'New York Times' Sunday crossword puzzle is contagious."

Knights of the Square Table.

"Never gonna give thou up -- Never gonna let thou down -- Never gonna run around and desert thouuuuuu."

Two gamers play in a game arcade near a machine titled; 'Get a life'.

'You can't recuse yourself from a war!'

"You fools! That's not the boiling oil, that's my beef casserole!"

Hysterically laughing monster.

"Can you do battle with him later?... He's watching, 'Game of Thrones'."

'McWit, I'd like to talk to you about your blood classification system.'

'The wife says if I don't give up snooker, she's leaving me. . .I'm going to miss her.'

'I hate to tell you this, but there was a hole in my pocket, and I lost the budget surplus.'

"One of you go see who's at the door."

"This is the first time you've ever planned a moat, I'm guessing?"

"Can you write 'To Mandy - you're the best'?"

"You never know what will catch on!"

"With a little luck he'll be a benevolent teenager."

Newton discovers surrealism

"I'm sorry, sir, but a blade's a blade."

Knight Vision

Scheduel.

A dragon has eaten my knight, please help.

"We both agreed that for a while she'd slay the dragons and I'd look after the castle."

There he goes, the bravest M&A knight that our little kingdom has ever known.