Lyricists T-Shirts

'Uh, Jake, I believe that should be 'and the skies are not cloudy all day,' not 'and we pour ourselves more Chardonnary.''

Senta jumps into the sea

'As I walk through the halls, I see teachers teaching and students learning and I say to myself, 'what wonderful school, what a wonderful world.''

'The next piece contains sex, violence, and Homeric epithets.'

Blues artis's daily list

"I always thought love made the world go round."

Fuzz - Fuzzy writes a song with a positive message.

"Those are the lyrics? How embarrassing—I've been singing it wrong this whole time."

'I changed my status from LLC to LL Cool C.'

"I'm stuck for the 'June-moon' rhyme in Serbo-Croatian."

'Cole Porter has the lyrics checked'

"Yes, 'the lion sleeps tonight', I know the tune, but it means it's had a good feed during the day, which is not really a good thing..."

Tragedy! When the feeling's gone and you can't go on.

Olden Day Battle of the Bands (Bard vs Sonnet).

"I feel that what would really give your next album a major boost would be some kind of well-publicized personal problem."

'My resume,...in rap form!'

"How come they remember every word of any pop song but not a single line of poetry?"

Vasiliy Lebedev-Kumach

"Well, we've for the melody down now, but I'm still not sure about the part where it goes, '...and they call the wind Dorcas Schnickelbaum.'"

"Great moments in songwriting" "What if she had a little lamb?" "Maybe it follows her to school?" "Wouldn't that make the children laugh?" "Exactly."

'This one writes some fine lyrics, and the other one has composed some beautiful music, but they just done't seem to hit it off as collaborators.'

'This next one I wrote myself. It's about pain, misery and heartbreak, until I finally wised up and dumped him.'

'Moon, June...'

"Yeah, most people are surprised when they learn I'm actually a lyricist."

"Moon….June Croon….Loon… …Tycoon"

"I don't do spells. I'm a wizard at deciphering rap lyrics."

"I'm composing a song for the new administration. It's entitled, 'Hell to the chief'."

Dolores O'Riordan

'The country just may not be ready for patriotic rap.'

'I know.. Let's write a song all about the evils of material wealth. After all, that last one netted us a bloody fortune!'