Lyric Virtuoso T-Shirts

Olden Day Battle of the Bands (Bard vs Sonnet).

"Here's another one written in E minor and in case you haven't guessed by now, it's the only chord I know."

Rejected Titles For The Canadian National Anthem.

'The next piece contains sex, violence, and Homeric epithets.'

Trilby - 'A voice he didn't understand'.

"Eventually the instrument becomes an extension of your body."

"My nephew Jack here can say ‘I’m unemployed’ in seven languages."

"Whine and cheezed party."

'Either you do or you don't - there isn't any 'cooling-off' period!'

"Nobody listens to me complain quite like you do."

'He's the bluesman's bluesman.'

'Cole Porter has the lyrics checked'

"You have to practice because if the Devil challenges you to a fiddle contest and wins, he gets your soul."

Tragedy! When the feeling's gone and you can't go on.

I'm a songbird. He's my lyricist.

"I'm stuck for the 'June-moon' rhyme in Serbo-Croatian."

War Heros Variety Night (playing a tune on his medals).

Like many kids, Bobby had an imaginary friend. Unfortunately for Bobby, he was a critic.

Giuseppe Verdi

Does "worldly goods" include intellectual property?

"Can you teach me to really bark? I only seem to be able to yap..."

'I'm a voice over artist.'

"I feel that what would really give your next album a major boost would be some kind of well-publicized personal problem."

"I don't like the tone of your voice. Mind if I tweak it a bit?"

"Now this is a Francis Ford Coppola. We still haven't been here quite long enough to be drinkable ourselves."

Trying cellos, too big!

"Do I take drugs? Hey man, you hum it and I'll sing it"

". . . and do you, John, give up your smug air of bemused detachment for the demands of marriage?"

"Well, we've for the melody down now, but I'm still not sure about the part where it goes, '...and they call the wind Dorcas Schnickelbaum.'"

Leonard Cohen

"...and are you, Jessica, committed to this bit?"

Hacksaw Violin.

What your guitar says about you.

Vasiliy Lebedev-Kumach

"Great moments in songwriting" "What if she had a little lamb?" "Maybe it follows her to school?" "Wouldn't that make the children laugh?" "Exactly."