Lover Of Quirky Gifts Mugs

'Brand X, the wine for those with indiscriminate taste.'

'Here you go, kid! A worm.'

"And as soon as he's on the mend,we'll get the physiotherapist in here with a ball of twine."

"All natural snow cones for sale."

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

Cheeze Wiz.

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop

'Take my tip,sonny and say it with jelly babies.'

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

Emergency Phone.

Easter Island Cheeseheads

'They help with my nicotine patch addiction.'

"'How We Die' - fabulous!"

'We have three minutes left.'

You don't need to believe EVERYTHING you are told.

"It's my home grown quail call. Quail don't come when I blow it, but cows sure do."

'When you said you had an investment in gold, you didn't mention it was in your teeth!'

Diner

Fly fishing.

Whittling a forget-me-not moose for the one you adore...

Pull my finger! Zombie Humor.

High speed cinder block

"It's our most popular gift - a helium cookie."

A Crash-test Dummy child about to have a ride on a car crash test ride in a shopping centre mall.

'Oh, we have an excellent benefits package ??" major medical, dental plan, vacation, retirement, nude encounter sessions....'

"Oh, Oh, Oooohh!"

'Will you be wanting this?'

'The worst thing about it is I'm claustrophobic.'

A baby using a heavy duty drill

'It's too cheap, can I haggle you up?'

"Shouldn't have, you really."

'What do you mean these aren't donut holes'

Bio-Engineered Fruit of the Month Club

'Your deceased husband keeps saying: don't call him. He'll call you.'

'Six years ago you received a complimentary set of steak knives. You thought they were free didn't you Jimmy?...'